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Jokes about Putin's conceptions of civil society abound. Some draw
analogies with the jokes about Andropov. For example, one wag has it
that Andropov loved to collect jokes about himself, ultimately
filling twenty prison cells.
Once, Putin was asked if he planned to develop democracy in
Russia.
"I do," he said, "only this democracy will differ slightly from
the democracy in the West. For example, in the way that an
electric chair differs from a regular chair."
Putin goes to a restaurant with the leaders of the two houses of
parliament. The waiter approaches and asks Putin what he would
like to order.
"I'll
have the meat."
"And what about the vegetables?"
"They'll have the meat, too."
At a press-conference a journalist asked Putin:
"Mr. Putin, do you intend to follow the development of civil
society in Russia?" Putin replied, "I haven't followed anybody
for ten years!"
The
leaders are in a train when it suddenly stops. There is no track
ahead. Lenin says: We should organize a voluntary communist workday!
Stalin: If that track isn’t laid soon, I’ll call the firing squad!
Khrushchev: Let’s take the track from behind and put it up ahead.
Brezhnev: Let’s shake the train and hoot — and pretend that we are
moving forward. Gorbachev: We have to speak openly about this!
Yeltsin: Let’s sell oil overseas and buy the track — you know? Putin:
Terrorists!
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